


Fate’s Design (what once was mine)

by unfortunate17



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Liam is his boyfried, M/M, This is a mess of 3 am feelings, Zayn is a time traveler, ziam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-01
Updated: 2014-02-01
Packaged: 2018-01-10 19:11:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1163413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unfortunate17/pseuds/unfortunate17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn is haunted by time. Liam calls it an obsession (Alternatively, the one in which Zayn can time-travel in order to witness different moments of his life.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fate’s Design (what once was mine)

————

Zayn is a shadow. 

Invisible to everyone other than himself - and only the present version of himself. The Zayn from the past he’s currently visiting has not even a sliver of an idea that a version of him from the future is watching him. 

Or more accurately, watching his boyfriend. 

Zayn-from-the-past is bright and happy, tangling himself on the hotel sheets with a curly haired boy that will leave a burned out hold in the middle of his chest. Zayn would feel sorry for him if he wasn’t holding everything he’s ever wanted forever in his arms. 

"Liam," Zayn-from-the-past murmurs, "I love you. I love you so much."

Liam shoves back the curls from where they’re falling into his eyes. Zayn still remembers the day he shaved them all off. Liam smiles shyly up at Zayn-from-the-past and threads his fingers into his hair, “Love you more.”

Zayn’s going to be  _sick._

Zayn-from-the-past has no such inclination however because his face lights up innocently and he leans down to melt his and Liam’s mouths in a slow, burning kiss. 

Zayn is jealous of himself. This is a new low.

Liam’s incredibly responsive - always has been. There’s happiness in being that wanted, Zayn remembers. Liam used to grapple for him in bed, hold him close while he slept, and held his hand in public. He was ridiculously affectionate and Zayn can’t wrap his mind around why he left. 

He watches Liam toss a leg around Zayn-from-the-past’s waist and slide his hands under his shirt before Zayn’s turning into the hotel room with tears in his eyes. 

He’s so pathetic.

Except, Zayn can’t stay away. 

————

Fast forward ten years and a version of Zayn and Liam are still lying on a bed. Except this time there are machines hooked up to Liam’s arms and Zayn-from-the-future’s cradling his frail body to his chest as he wracks with sobs. 

The nurse around him grays out, “I’m sorry. We did everything we could.”

Zayn-from-the-future looks up at her and Zayn can see his own fury from even across the room. Liam had liked it; said it made him more alive, “He’s not dead, yet.”

The nurse bows her head and steps back respectfully. Zayn can see what Zayn-from-the-future is ignoring - the nurse is biting her lip and there are tears in her eyes. 

Liam will not make it through the night.

Zayn’s already seen the funeral and the moment when the post-funeral version of himself will nearly give himself alcohol poisoning before climbing into Liam’s side of the bed. 

"Zayn?"

Liam’s voice is frail and yet still so, so, beautiful. Zayn can tell it’s the best thing Zayn-from-the-future’s heard all day. 

"Yeah," Zayn-from-the-future whispers into Liam’s hair, "Yeah, Li. I’m here what do you need, jaan?"

God, what a stupid nickname. Too bad Zayn still loves it. 

Liam turns to face him and he’s gaunt - so different from the curly-haired, round cheeked boy Zayn has seen just seconds before, “Kiss me.”

Zayn turns away as Zayn-from-the-future leans in. He has no intention of watching Liam’s last breath leave his body before he absolutely has to. 

In the mean time, Zayn-from-the-future’s screaming is vivid enough. 

————

He wakes up gasping. Cold sweat shinning across his forehead as he tries to get his tumbling heart under control again. 

Liam turns to face him, covers shifting around him as he lays a hand on Zayn’s chest, “Babe? Zayn? Did you travel again?”

Zayn lets out the sob he didn’t think he was still holding in, “Yeah.” He slides down and pulls Liam, warm, whole, healthy Liam close to him and  mouths at his neck, “Yeah, but I’m back. Thank fuck.”

Liam makes a soft noise and his warm hands come up to cup Zayn’s waist. Zayn doesn’t know what he’s going to do without them there. How he’s going to live. Doesn’t have the courage to look that far ahead, “Do you want to talk about it?”

"You know I can’t," Zayn replies, "Against the rules."

He feels more than sees Liam huff a breath indignantly, “Time-walkers and their fancy rules. What a _stupid_  rule.”

Zayn nudges him weakly and drops a kiss to his hair, “I can’t, love. Now, it’s late, Li. Sorry for waking you. Go back to bed.”

Zayn still has a good seven years. 

Liam sighs, “I wish you’d just stop traveling. I think it’d help you, actually.”

And how can Zayn do that? When maybe one travel might help save Liam’s life. Even though he knows he can’t change events, just observe, there’s his irrational self - his irrational hope - that something can be done. Even though it can’t. “I can’t, babe.”

"You’re  _obsessed,_ Zayn. It’s not healthy. Yeah, all time-walkers travel but none of them obsessively check their lives the way you do.”

"Liam," Zayn breathes harshly. He flinches at his own voice, however. He never wants Liam to be anything but happy, "Please," he mutters, softening his tone, "Can we just go to bed?"

Liam concedes, if a little reluctantly, “Okay. Night, then.” He hides his smile in Zayn’s neck, “Love you and see you in the morning.”

"Yeah," Zayn chokes, "Love you more."

There’s such a long pause that Zayn thinks Liam’s fallen asleep while he struggles to come down from the pure devastation under his skin. He still has time. Plenty of time to map out Liam’s skin and love him from the inside out. 

No need to worry yet. 

Seven, good, long years. 

"Zayn?"

Zayn hums, “Yes?”

Liam shifts back to look at him, and he’s a little shy around the edges, “Are we- are we still - you know, together? In the future, I mean?”

Zayn laughs, ” ‘til death do us part, babe.”

Liam’s eyes light up and Zayn nearly throws up, “Forever then?”

"You’re my forever," Zayn mutters back to him, "You know that. You’ve always known that."

"Mhm," Liam sighs happily, "Just nice to know for sure, yeah."

"Forever," Zayn says to him again. 

His voice is hollow. 

————

**Author's Note:**

> Don't kill me - I watched Tangled. And that song, dude - that song. Blame the song.


End file.
